Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Update!

Well, I forgot to post the John Kerry comments and hope to do that sometime by the end of this week. I'm gearing up for a mission trip to Mexico next week, so you fine people keep me in your prayers. Just returned from Chambersburg, PA and loved every minute of it. Met some great people and really had a love for the road and learned some neat things, like, prayer can be really simple. I'm currently working a Preface to a book that I'm writing and could really use some prayers for that as well. That it would be gracious and merciful. It's a week after the elections so sit back and watch some CNN or listen to talk radio, it will be a dandy.

Have a goodin'.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Kid's Say The Darndest Things!

Well it has been some time since I've posted and I thought today was a good day for some posting. I've been going since 6:30a, I've had a pot of coffee and I've watched an episode of the office. Right now I'm shaking because I'm hungry and need food.

Many of you are parents or one day wanting to be parents, I'm not a parent yet but would love to have children only if I could find a wife first, but not necessarily, I could be a single dad who has adopted. I thought though as I heard a radio segment yesterday about this what are some things that you don't want to hear your kids say. So I with the help of one, have compiled a list of things you don't want to hear your kids say.

- I want a divorce.
- I'm movin' in with Jonny.
- I'm chosen your not. (For my Calvinist friends)
- I'm 25 and still suck my thumb.
- I'm 30 and love petticoats.
- I want to speak in a loud voice.
- I'm Elvis Reincarnate.
- Should I ride the bus or ride my bike.
- Could I wear a dickey.
- Babysit, I make way more money dancin.
- Mom...Dad, My new boyfriend is a great kisser, almost as good as Cousin Frank.
- Mom...Dad, I need advice, Should I pose for Penthouse or Hustler. (I would have a heart attack)
- Mom...Dad, I think he's great marrying material, He has a Harley and owns his own business, making Crystal Meth in his basement.

There are a few things that you don't want to hear your kids say. I hope you all have a great day and stay tuned for tomorrow as I bring apology's John Kerry would give if he decided he was going to give one.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

CDH Life

As you may or may not know, I'm in a program called the Community Discipleship House (CDH) which is through Crossroads Worldwide Ministries. It is a year long internship in which we live with eight other people and share life together by building community, following under the discipleship of Matt Orth, Clayton King and other strange characters. It has really been an exciting, adventurous life that has opened my eyes, my ears, and my heart.

We each have a bedroom that we share with another person. My roommate happens to be a guy from Glasgow, KY. His name is Nick Lewis and he really is on the opposite end of personality. He is your outdoors man, who likes to hunt, slack line, and pretty much anything that falls under the day of sun. He and I met at Crossroads Summer Camp and by the end of the Camp he was now my roommate at CDH. We have developed a great friendship and encouraging spurring on of Love and Good deeds.

So, I've always wanted to go on a cross country trip and just see this large yet small country that we live in. I've wanted to start in Wilmington, NC and end up in West Hollywood, CA (to see my friend Dallas Morgan). I thought that I would never get to do this because I wouldn't be able to find someone to go with me or the proper transportation and just the sheer task that it would be. Well, if you watch Oprah you would know 1)What's going on in the world and 2)What's about to be hot on the market, but most importantly you would know that she and her friend Gayle just went on a cross country road trip. When I found out about it I was hooked and the desire to go across the U.S. of A intensified. I talked with Nick and asked would he ever want to do something like this, as to where he responded, "Yeah". So as of right now we are beginning to plan a cross country trip from NC to CA up the pacific coast highway and then back over the northern part of the U.S. of A. Pray for us and most importantly please suggest of any odd things that we could see along the way that you might know of and possibly pass along the numbers of friends and family that may would help us out that happen to be spread out around the country. Again, It's the beginning stages of the planning and things will of course change.

We don't want to just go around the country to merely do something, we don't want to go and say we did it, we want to go around the country to be changed by it, to experience the greatness that we live in and to be in the right place at the right time for the right reasons.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Yaye and Naye



The Parody Reverend. Comedy, well to some of you.

Monday, October 09, 2006

ESPN College Game Day

So as I made my trip to Florida this weekend to see the Gators play in The Swamp, I ended up being on ESPN College Game Day. It was a long day and I was very tired but it was worth the orange safety hard hat that I got and the three times that I was on TV. The funny thing about the whole thing is i'm not a big football fan of sorts but I was on the football of all football shows. We're safely back home now and enjoying all that is here to enjoy in Boiling Springs, NC. Plan on making a trip back to Anderson soon (October 20-22) I hope to see some people but if not, oh well. Have an awesome day my peeps.

Friday, October 06, 2006

KFC/Taco Bell Devotional One

So I just began the KFC/Taco Bell Combo and really enjoy it. I mean it's long, fast, and a lot to learn but it should be a good thing to stretch myself and expand in my life.

Yesterday I started my second day on the job and I have to tell you about the Combo, you never know who is going to work. I had some of the same people working with me but there only training at our store so they'll be gone soon. I started the actual line yesterday and it was fast. After the rush hour of lunch orders and all was a bit clean we on the back line and a chicken cook began to talk about relationships, commitment and marriage. I started to listen and all of a sudden wanted to say something so poignant that sounded so great to all of there hurting ears. Then it hit me, I couldn't say anything. I just stood and heard there hearts and minds.

Last night after the Demolition Derby, which was amazing 1) Cars bashing one another 2) a little Geo that was in the small car heat that not only implode an airbag, smoked one time really bad but restarted his little car three more times. 3) During the final round with all the best cars there was a somewhat injury, a scuffle if you will and the one finger salute between the final two remaining cars (Sudden Attitude and Slayer(driven by a woman)) I talked with my roommate about the combo and what had happened and then while we're talking it hit me what I had read in my time of quite earlier that day. James 1:19 Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. Wow, if we as followers of Christ could just hear the hearts of some of these hurting people, ourselves included, instead of trying to give them all the right answers at once He might be able to do more through us. I guess my point is directed at me when I say I wish I would quit trying to say the right things, but instead do the right things and build the right relationships with the people He has intended. Be encouraged all and just remember it's a daily process one that requires the renewing of our minds, may we take a moment to just sit still in SILENCE (that sometimes being the loudest noise ever) allowing the creator to speak to his creation.

I'm headed to Florida this weekend to hang out at the LSU/Florida game with some of my roommates, ya'll keep um straight up there.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

KFC/Taco Bell Combo

Today work began at the KFC/Taco Bell Combo. I received my small shirt that had the smell of grease and the stains to back it up. I borrowed a pair of black pants (that is a must purchase soon item) from my roommate and I started during the lunch hour rush in the town of Boiling Springs, NC with its one stop light so it was all the rush you could get on the first day. It went well and I hope to do a great job and meet some people in the area.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Tuesday News

Around the world and in your world news breaks daily so get your dose of daily news here on the porch.

The Office’s Kevin Character More Hip Everyman Than Loser
BURBANK, Calif. (Wireless Flash) – Playing big, slow guys is nothing new to rotund character actor Brian Baumgartner but he sees the character he plays on The Office as leaps above his usual roles.
Baumgartner admits the “big, sorta slow guy is nothing new in comedy” but says his Office character, Kevin Malone, is a fat part unlike his other roles.
In his words: “Kevin is completely honest and inappropriate – but he also has a confidence and a hipster [background] completely his own.”
The actor says he sees his character as being a hip writer or musician somewhere else “if he hadn’t taken the job at Dunder Mifflin.”
His one flaw, says Baumgartner, is that “he never figured out he was supposed to do that.”
The Office airs Thursdays on NBC.

A 68 year old peace activist says she was frustrated that everyone else isn't rabidly against the Iraq War like she is, so she's gone on a hunger strike "until there is a swell of protest against the war that the Bush administration cannot ignore." And she says she's willing to die for the cause. Again, why do people think hunger strikes have any effect? You're not eating? How does that affect me? It doesn't? I do care about one thing though, when is lunch?

I don't know about you but when i've been laughing a lot (thanks diddy and Judith for helping in this process) I sometimes get the hiccups, well no fear there seems to be a cure for them now.

I don't know if you remember the Stomach Piranta Story, but I'll never forget it. It appears to me that if I had used Pepto Bismol during that trying time and now If I wrote an essay about my experience I would have the chance at winning cash prizes.

I return to Charlotte tonight and I'm looking foward to that. You fine readers have an awesome day.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Great Weekend

I hope everyone who is reading had a great weekend. I haven't posted since the office and what an eposide, trully dry humor and trully wonderful.

Made a stealth like mission return home and had a great time seeing some great people. Thank you for the kind words of encouragement and the equipment to get the job done.

Today I finally applied for the passport that will be needed for an upcoming trip and also hopefully down the road trips of the country. It was an ordeal that just reminds me that life is trully great and should be laughed at a lot. I didn't realize you had to pay separte for the application and the service charge. After filling out the check (which happened to be my last in that stack) I was let know of this phenemon that is separtaion of Check and Cash, or Check and Check depending if you do not have Cash for the county Court House. Made my way to the U.S. Post Office for a money order and all was taken care of. Oh, and if you plan on buying something at the post office don't try to use a credit card they don't accept it, you better have Cash, Check, or Debit. Hope this comes in handy for all you blog readers.

Do It Together (Sometimes) and remember to keep your knees to the ground and your eyes on Jesus. Have an awesome day.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

The Office

Yes Folks, Tonight the premier of The Office kicks off for season three. Now I wasn't really ever an Office fan mainly because of my disgust with Sitcoms. While I was working in Radio I did traffic for the Rise Guys Morning Show, where they would always interview the actors/actress on the show. It peaked my curiosity and finally while in Atlanta spending the night at a friends house after my trip to LA he had the office season two ender and we watched it. It was entitled "Casino Night" it my friends was great and I fell into the likeness of The Office. So pull up a recliner and/or couch and relax for a laugh or two tonight at 8:30 on NBC. And now for the News Flash which ironically correlates with the Office.

92 Percent Of Bosses Think They'’re Doing Good Job; Only 67 Percent Of Workers Agree
NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) A whopping majority of American bosses are like Steve Carell'’s character on The Office: They think they'’re doing a good job but are oblivious to the truth.
According to a new survey by the Hudson staffing company, 92 percent of managers consider themselves an excellent boss.
However, only 67 percent of their underlings agree and 10 percent think their boss does a lousy job.
Still, there is one sign that the bosses may be aware of their leadership failings: 26 percent feel they did not give adequate training to handle their managerial responsibilities.
Meanwhile, 41 percent of American workers believe if their boss was canned, they'’d be offered the job but only half of those would actually take it.

Women Of The Office’ Want To See, Hear More From Jan
BURBANK, Calif. (Wireless Flash) Melora Hardin returns as hard-as-nails female executive Jan Levinson on tonight'’s season premiere of the NBC sitcom The Office, but she wants to do even more with the character.
Hardin says it'’s time for Jan to show she'’s more than just a straight woman stickler to Emmy winner Steve Carell'’s clueless boss and she wants to do that with music.
In real life, Hardin is a professionally trained singer and even has an idea how to work it in the plot of an upcoming episode.
Hardin hints that the character portrayed by Phyllis Smith may be involved in a wedding and Smith thinks “'Jan'” should sing at the ceremony.
She adds: "“We haven'’t really pitched that one to the writers yet."

I think now when I rejoin the gym this will be my new exercise experience.

And coming up here in Cleveland County is the Cleveland County Fair. Nothing like fried everything- fried twinkies, fried sandwiches, fried anything. They ought to just take the hot oil and inject it straight into your arteries.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

News Flash

All was well in the Metropolitan City of Charlotte last night. Clayton did a great message on defining moments. This past year for me seems like a defining moment and I can't wait to see where it goes and how I end up getting taught and used. Today I attempt the application process for a United States Passport for our mission trip to Mexico in November and possibly that trip to Africa one day (Diddy) and who knows but maybe Australia. You fine folks have a great one today and enjoy the following News Flash.

NEWS FLASH

No Lunch Ladies At Congressional Cafeteria

ALEXANDRIA, Va. (Wireless Flash) – It will be interesting to see which senator will be banished to the losers table tomorrow (Sept. 21) during the Capitol Hill school-lunch taste test.
During the event, Congress members will have a chance to test five different foods, which are being introduced as healthy school cafeteria alternatives.
The event is being hosted by the School Nutrition Association, which hopes to show members of Congress that foods like pizza can be healthy.
Congress members will test five different delicacies, including “Heddi Spaghetti,” “Sally Salad,” “Rocco Taco,” “Ricky Chicken” and, of course, “Pete Pizza.”
Then they’ll vote for their favorite.
Although milk and juice will be served, the cafeteria confections will not be dished out by hair-netted lunch ladies, because strict security rules in the House of Representatives allow only “special caterers” to prepare the food.
However, spokesman Erik Peterson promises that the recipes will “taste just like they do in a school cafeteria.”

How Important Is Your Twenty-Dollar Bill?
If a $20. bill blew from your hand and over the rail of a bridge, would you jump off the bridge to retrieve it? 50 feet down? This guy did. For him, twenty bucks is real money.

DUMB CROOK NEWS

When angrily vandalizing your philandering husband's truck, check the license plate. This moron and her friend didn't, and ended up trashing someone else's truck. Specifically, a cop's truck.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Clean Hands & Lazy Mail

Americans Aren'’t Coming Clean When It Comes To Handwashing

WASHINGTON, D.C. (Wireless Flash) A lot of Americans aren'’t coming clean about their handwashing. According to a new survey by the Soap and Detergent Association, 68 percent of Americans don'’t wash their mitts long enough to effectively remove germs or dirt. That'’s up from 54 percent who did a lousy handwashing job back in 2004. Despite this, 42 percent of Americans claim they wash their hands at least 10 times a day. However, 36 percent seldom wash their hands after coughing or sneezing and 31 percent don'’t wash their hands before eating lunch.

Let's Make This Wash Our Hands As Much As We Can Day!

Why did the postman just stash hundreds of pieces of mail in garbage bags in a shed instead of delivering them? He says he was just too lazy to bother. While I'm sure everyone there appreciates his candor, that's really not an acceptable answer. Wow, and I thought that I hated working in radio. I mean I didn't like reading the Centrum commercials but I never wanted to shred it up and not read it on the air.

Tonight I go to Charlotte to be apart of CharlotteONE and I'm excited about it. I get to go with Clayton King. Then Thursday I'll be in Clemson at Clemson FCA, with Matt Orth. A FUN week ahead and many more to come.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Chicken


I love church humor. I love odd things that churches do and yes I love to watch local church TV. I do check blogs that pastors have and there is one out of Ohio that I check in which he posted this picture. This chicken is placed infront of there church and of course was made by a member of that church, probably the reason that the Chicken gets placed out front. I hope that it puts a grin on your face on this lovely Tuesday.

Van Morrison


Like Me Some Van Morrison.

Numerous Requests

I have received numerous requests over the past few days that have inquired as to why I haven't been posting lately. As to where a response goes like this, "I don't like talking about myself a lot on here for two reasons, A) I become self-absorbed and I do that pretty good without blogging and B) Do you really care what I have to say and do I really have anything good to say anyway." Well I can say I'm not trying to be self-focused and so therefore I will speak of the times that are going on. I think I will just let the fingers flow and allow the heart to explore the gift of spontaneity.

As I've been living in this community of teaching, fellowship, prayer and breaking of the bread I've come to understand that we all long for such things in some form or another. We're all looking for teaching in aspects of money, parenting, relationships, and/or anything else that our minds can attempt to grasp or there the lack of (i.e. The books for dumbies). We are all wanting to find our nitch and place in soceity and will sometimes join the craziest things just to feel the acceptance that our soul so longs to have. I have come to many conclusions on things I don't know and need books to understand. A) Lost! There is a huge marathon going on as I type. B) Football! There has been so much football on the two televisions that we own, I wish I was invincible.

There are some great people though that live not only in this house but in this community and the fellowship with them under the head of Christ has been extradinoary and the prayer that has flowed from hearts and minds of these wonderful people have been challenging and moving all together. I spent the early morning of yesterday in Tryon, NC with my friend Paul Wilson, whom I can say that I would fight side by side any day and would know that he had my back. He yesterday not only taught me about the importance of rest and relaxation, but he allowed me to experience the importance of it and the importance to just sit and hang out with a friend. We need it and I loved it. Thanks Paul! I miss all of you back home, but have found peace in the new home that is being formed.

I wonder if people who didn't believe in Christ, not because of the historical evidence or the biblical accounts of Him, could have seen friendship in the (I believe) the purest of form on the cabins front porch would have seen the light of Christ. That at least would be my hope not only for that friendship and that experience, but for all friendships and experiences in life. During the course of this year at CDH, we are required to read a book a month from a choice of books in our CDH library. This month's reading is 'A Severe Mercy' by Sheldon Vanauken. It has to be one of my favorite books that I've ever read, well besides Vision & The Vow.

Vanauken was not a Christian when he and his wife Davy met and fell inloveness, as he calls it. There journey took them to Oxford where the Holy Spirit wouldn't stop pursuing them and where they would choose to believe and follow Christ. Sheldon wrote the following in his book and I hope that it causes you to think and encourage you as much as it did for me. It would also be helpful to note that Sheldon did not know Christ in a relational form when he wrote this, he however was on a journey to learn about Christianity and to make sense of it. Until next time, Keep your knees to the ground and your eyes on Jesus.

The best argument for Christianity is Christians: their joy, their certainty, their completeness. But the strongest argument against Christianity is also Christians-when they are sombre and joyless, when they are self-righteous and smug in complacent consecration, when they are narrow and repressive, then Christianity dies a thousand deaths. But, though it is just to condemn some Christians for these things, perhaps, after all, it is not just, though very easy, to condemn Christianity itself for them. Indeed, there are impressive indications that the positive quality of joy is in Christianity - and possibly nowhere else. If that were certain, it would be proof of a very high order.
-Sheldon Vanauken

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Truth/Trust

Some nuggets from Erwin McManus that have really spoke to me.

The crisis of confidence and meaning in our society, the relationship of subjective and objective truth, and the importance of trustworthiness. The search for meaning, relationship, and progress mirror the Apostle Paul’s categories of faith, hope, and love and point towards God’s fingerprint on creation.

Truth sits in the middle of trust.

When we detach ourselves from God we actually move away from truth.
Objective and Subjective truth minmize the attitude of risk.

Just because everything is connected doesn't mean that everything is God.

Have you ever felt insignificant, it's because you are. But it is wrong for me to tell you that you have no value, and if there is no God and that your created in his image than what was said is is true.

We're over acheivers!
Two reasons for mid-life crisis:
1. You chose a goal an idea of who you can be to abtain it and you do whatever you can to achieve it and you realize your closer to death than birth and see that you cannot suceed.
2. You define sucess and you do whatever it is to accomplish it and you sacrafice everything you have set out to do and you accomplish it and you are still as empty inside and you found more meaning in the pursuit of that goal than that goal could ever give you and now you wonder if something you threw away was that thing of greatest value.

Everyone of us will wake up tomorrow wondering if tomorrow will be greater than today or you will move to a level of despair that will paralyze you.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Master Control

BLAST OFF! I'm in studio 1A of WGWG and I can't believe i'm about to make a return the airwaves. To think that I would be back here in this position is weird and amazing at the sametime. God is amazing and it is a Beautiful Day.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Whitley Wednesday

So here at the CDH we have a little library that we can chose a book to read for that month and then turn in a book report about what we thought about it and/or how we may have disagreed with that particular book. Some incredible books are within the shelves of our palatal library. This month I chose to start off with a book by Dr. Larry Crabb "Inside Out." This week I'm about done with it and I read a great quote from it that I would love to share with you on the importance of a spirit of humility and not a spirit of demandingness that we seem to find when things do not go well, especially for an extended time. When that suffering is poured out from a twisted bitter demanding spirit we're met a surgeon rather than our Advocate who is here to care for us. Hopefully, that sets the stage for this weeks Whitley Wednesday Quote.

Perhaps the first step in learning humility is to consider who it is we think must change. A demand that things be different represents an accusation against God, a charge that He's guilty of mismanagement and negligence in His duties.
- Dr. Larry Crabb from "Inside Out"

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

I'm Back On the Air!

It really seems crazy to be saying this, but i'm going back on the radio. Well it's going to be for three hours a week. Thursday afternoons 4-6pm I'll be playing the tunes of AAA and Americana formats on 88.3 a 50,000 watt radio station a part of Gardner-Webb University. If you get a chance take a listen in Greenville north or just take a peek on the internet at WGWG FM 88.3.

Monday, August 21, 2006

My Brotha's and Sista's



So Here It is our first sibiling picture.

Back Row: Sara, Kelly, and Amanda
Front Row: Brent, Zach, Justin, and Nick

This fine family photo was taken at Kate's Skate. We decided that it would be good to build community at a local skating rink. The great thing about Kate's was the music selection. It was the best mix of today and yesterday. The moment it went from Lil Jon & the East Side Boys "Snap Yo Fingers" immediately to Casting Crowns "Who Am I" I knew that I was in the right place.

As you may notice I'm wearing a smokin' hot suit bought a smokin' low price. I've worn this suit to a BBQ joint and now to Kate's. I plan to pretty much wear this suit to all functions that revolve around class. I was wearing this suit as you again can tell, and I was asked if I was a preacher. You know a man of the cloth. When I responded with a quick and dry comment like, "I'm working on it." So I need some help, but it was fun.

Keep Close To One Another and Have A Family Day.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

CDH possibly on American Idol


This is one of my roommates that I will be living with for the next year, well maybe. He and some others from the Boiling Springs, NC area made there way to Biringham, AL this past weekend to try out for American Idol. They didn't make it to Hollywood, but at least they got to experience trying out for American Idol. Below is a story from a Alabama news website.

'Idol' shoo-in
You read it here first. This guy is going to make it through at least the first round of "American Idol" auditions, and I'd be willing to bet you'll see him on TV at some point, too.

His name is Justin Brock. He's 22, and he's from Clemson, South Carolina.

The Taylor Hicks look-alike sang a brief rendition of "Let Me Leave" by Marc Broussard for al.com's cameras (which we'll post Monday along with dozens of other video clips), and he's pretty good. I'm not qualified to say whether he's good enough for the show, but his grey hair will certainly help propel him along for a bit.

Can you believe that he told us that he's going to wear a hat to the auditions?

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

CDH Storm

Last week we had a pretty sever thunderstorm roll through the hills of Boiling Springs, NC. It consisted of heavy rain, enough to wash white lighting, Lighting closer than you like it to be, and bright enough to see the trees, and thunder that would rattle dentures out of any seventy year olds mouth. After that storm I jotted this attempt of a poem down. I hope you like it or at least can take something out of it as encouraging.

CDH Storm

Tonight the Sky lit bright,
with the lighting illuminating white.

The lighting lit the clouds
the thunder echoed through the trees.

There was a presence surrounding us that
was bigger than life lived itself.

That same light can shine out of us
and the same thunder can echo from within us,
to a surrounding crowd that is as empty as a dead
oak tree.

A light of hope and a thunder of love.

Shall we not be afraid and bow to the wind of destruction,
but may we take action in our friend and stand against that wind
on a rock that is stronger than any tempest within.

May we rise above destruction if we are there.

And go to a safe place, like the shadow of a wing,
to sing praises to our king from above and within.

IT'S BAAACK - WHITLEY WEDNESDAY

Well CDH is off and running and I'm now in somewhat of a routine. I do my three mile run on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and keep trying to extend that each week to further develop my running skills. As I was running this morning it hit me that I need to bring back Whitley Wednesday, especially since she is practically my neighbor now. I will also be posting a few things that I have acquired to jot down in my notebook since I've been here hopefully to encourage everyone to do something productive for the day and/or with there life.

Today's quote comes from just a year and two days. I was strangely enough in Charlotte, helping a guy named Brock Gill with a performance he did at Carowinds. He was in a conversation with a guy named David St. James, you may not know him, but you know his daughter Rebecca St. James. During the conversation Brock said this and I jotted it down on a piece of paper. Without further delay I present the Whitley Wednesday Quote.

Passion without Wisdom is chaos.
- Brock Gill


Have an awesome day folks.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

New Look

A new look for a new chapter in life, beginning August 7th.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Livermush

So this morning at 10am, I did it, I ate Livermush. It may sound disturbing, it may make you want to gag, or even black out, but this southern delicacy wasn't nothing to play around with. It was really good. I went with another Crossroads staff member over to the Snack Shop were we partook in such a dish. I have to admit that I was really nervous about trying it, but if I was going to be living here for the upcoming year I had to try it. It came out on toast, in the form of a sandwich. It really looked like a sausage patty, but did not have a sausage taste. The sandwich was cut in half and on one half we smeared strawberry jam (that would make you want to slap your grandma)and on the other half it was left plain. I took my first bite not knowing what to expect, when to my tastebuds I found nothing but goodness.

I think that the only reason we are afraid to try it, is because of the name and of all the horrific stories we've heard of people who tried it, but were turned off by it, because it didn't live up to there expectations or just wasn't something they could truly finish because the sacrifice to the stomach was to much. It kind of reminds me of following Christ. I'm not saying that Christ should be compared to Livermush, but I am saying that just like being afraid of eating Livermush, I've seen so many kids over the past three weeks afraid to put there life and trust of that life in the hands of Jesus Christ. Your not sure at first what it's going to be like. You've maybe seen the bad TV evangelists and you think you have to be like that. You've been around the holier than thou folks and they left a bad taste in your mouth, maybe like the first time you ever had liver by itself. So, when it comes to following Christ with all you got your not sure what to think, you just know that people tell you, you need it, and that once you decide to follow Jesus you'll stop doing bad things and you'll be bored the rest of your life. Except it's more than just keeping you from doing bad things, because if that's all that Jesus came to do than he really did waste a lot of his time, because the law was used to keep you from doing bad things. No, Jesus was more than that, He was a conqueror of death, He was one that claimed to be God in the flesh and then died an innocent death and rose from the dead three days later where he spent time with those who knew him when he was alive. A He was a friend to the friendless, He was a doctor to the sick and he looked for people who didn't match up to the standards of the day to follow Him and to do great things in his name. He asks that you believe in Him and who He claimed to be and how he proved it and to love him with all your heart, and to love your neighbor with all your heart no matter what might happen. He connects you to God, He truly is the bridge between God and mankind. His spirit of truth guides you on this big ball of dirt and unleashes the person you were created to be.

The beautiful thing about it, is along this unknown journey you might have with Jesus you can question things just like questioning the waitress about what's in Livermush. He is a big God and if you don't believe it think about the last time you saw a sun setting behind those large oak trees on the hill across the way. You can also trust that He want leave your side, it may get quite and you might not feel it, but that's the time as I heard one Youth Pastor say the first week at camp, is the time to practice your faith and to use it all the more. It's also the reason you need someone to come along with you, just like I had this morning. Whether you believe in Jesus or not, that's up to you, but as I've journeyed over the past two years, I've needed Him and I will always need Him. He created me for something, and believes I can do it with his help, that's more than some earthly fathers I know will tell you. I can vouch for the following statement, "YOU MATTER TO GOD." Break the walls down that hold you back from truly expressing yourself and from truly putting your trust into Jesus Christ and your obedience to God and the plans he has for your life. Let go of past experiences that left you broken, bitter, and confused and grab a hold of Faith, Hope, and Love. This journey you have to try it for yourself at times and to test it, but the cool thing about it is that there are others out there, maybe beside you who are genuinely wanting to take a first step on the journey with you. Like the Livermush took control of my tastebuds this morning and made me think why it's not a national past time food, you have to let God take you on this journey and chase the moments that could be the greatest you ever had and the greatest for all generations to come.

A) (1 Corinthians 15:1-11)

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

HOWDY CAMPERS

Hello Madda, Hello Fadda, It's Brent Sears from Crossroads Summer Camps and i'm just extending an overdue Howdy. It has been an awesome three weeks in Boiling Springs, NC. I've sweated like a pig about to go into the slaughter house, i've drank more water than the fish in the lake, and i'm about to completely understand the unsantized conditions of community showers. I mean if your nice enough to leave a community bar of soap, have the decenacy not to steal it.

The third week has kicked off strong and i'm looking forward to kicking off the fourth and final week of camp. It has been awesome to meet some great guys and gals from all over the southeast and some northerns, (YANKEE). However, they don't act like them in any shape or form. I've hung out with some awesome kids from all over the southeast as well. One of my favorites was a guy named Hunter who had the deepest southern GA. accent one young man could have. He worked on a chicken farm, in which the question was asked, "Do the chickens have large talons?" He didn't really get, but he did share some great insights on chicken farming, so if I ever decide to take up that hobby or profession i'll have some forsight into the business.

I miss you all and hope that you all are well. I know that i'm exactly where I need to be. It just amazes me that a guy from Anderson, SC who recently quit his job and had no idea that he would be here, gets to really be here. In order to ignite a reaction you really do need to break the status quo and shake things up. I've learned that is really how God shines his faithfulness, when you are faithful to his call on your life. He really is longing to connect with us and can only do so if, we just open ourselves up to it. I use to think that he was far away and only picked really cool people to do things, but the truth is he really picks, geeks, freaks, and uniques to do some pretty extradionary things, I mean have you read the Bible.

I thank you all for your support, prayers, and friendships over the past years. I never knew that three summers ago when I went through one of the hardest times of my life that this would truly be the wake-up from the break-up. You all continue to shine, continue to laugh and by all means chase the one who created you to be unique through the relationship that puts to shame all relationships, the relationship between father and children, husband and wife, and mystery. May we all become the individuals that Jesus died to unleash and may we all live in such a way that when people looked at us, they couldn't help but to stop and look up at the stars and say that the same one who created all that created the community of people that i'm looking at. In Jesus' name, Amen.


P.S. If you hadn't tried Livermush you really ought to get your hands on some. I plan to let you know how it taste in a week or so.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Friends

The other day I was talking with some people about friends and it got me to thinking what should a friendship look like, or at least try to look like. I took a read in the Bible, the conversation between God and mankind. It has some interesting things to say, such as, "A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. a

It seems that in our busy lifestyles we're all in search for sometimes as many friends as we can get to hang out with us and just to be around us. It seems that in that hot pursuit we come up with nothing more than a bunch of acquaintances that we only know by name and job, which we usually end up forgetting that much when it's all said and done with.

Maybe, you've been giving and giving and giving it seems like to those you call friends with what seems like no return of any giving back. It's as if you have thrown the Friendship boomerang and it seems it has gotten caught on the receiving ringer. But again God's conversation with all of us in the Bible says, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. b That one is tough to swallow personally. I really have a hard time with that verse. To lay down my life for the ones that wrong me, ignore me, maybe even deny me when around certain people they know. To act as if I don't exist when all the while they know my name don't they. Could this be what it means to be Christ like? Because in essence that is what ended up happening to Jesus, in fact it went a step further, one of his confidants would betray him that would lead to his death. Death due to the betrayal of a friend, brother or sister. Maybe though, in that death of betrayal we could realize that we weren't alone, that in fact in that moment we were experiencing what our God in the flesh experienced, but isn't good to know or come to know that even death of betrayal couldn't hold him down. He conquered death and we also can conquer that death by offering and giving ourselves to the one who originally took that place and is calling us into something bigger than ourselves, something so great we couldn't ask for it or imagine it.

So as our pursuit of friends and relationships come and go, may we try if we dare to get to a point in our journey of life that we didn't ask who will be my friend, but instead asked the question who can I be a friend to that I could invest my time, energy, talents, gifts, resources, and self into even if it cost me my life.

Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Galatians 6:2


A) Proverbs 18:24
B) John 15:13

Long Time, No Speak

Hello all in the world of the interweb.

I've been away from the web of sorts for sometime now, and have decided to take the plunge again. I'm going to make this short and sweet, then i'll post my newest thoughts, as if you care. So I quit my job and my last day was May 5th, where afterwards I made a trip to LA on 64 Wendy's cups which rocked. I highly vote AirTran as one of my favorite airlines to fly with. Then I took some time and spent it with the family. Well on my return from LA, I hung out with a good friend who let me in on a little something going on in Boiling Springs, NC. It's called the Community Discipleship Home, I applied and a week later was accepted and offered a job to work at Crossroads Summer Camp. He is always faitful, even when I'm faithless. Patient even when i'm impatient. I hope that everyone has a rocking summer and do me just one favor. Put in your favortie music CD, roll down the windows and rock that baby out.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Trucker Thursday 3

Today is Thursday and that means a big (Air Horn Honk) salute to the Big Rig that Rolls On.

This week I couldn't help but salute two types of trucks.

The Big Rig Salute goes to all of the Columbia Farms Chicken Trucks that i've had the pleasure of being behind, beside, and passing by during my tenyor of work in Greenville. What would I have done without the smell of chicken crap at 5:25am in the morning? Thanks Chicken Trucks. The smell was worth the taste of your delicious fingers and breasts at local eating establishments.

The next Big Rig Salute goes to all of the Moving Trucks that i've had the pleasure of passing on my stretch of I-85 between Greenville and Anderson and vise versa. I pick the Moving Truck for one reason alone, I'm moving on from the world of Radio. You've been great and you taught a lot about people, character, and myself. I'll pack these things up and carry them with me from here til to the end of the day.

Have a great Thursday everyone and feel free to salute your favorite Truck and give the international sign of love, the clinched fist and your right arm in the right angle position going up and down.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Whitley Wednesday

Today's quote comes from a nice gentleman from Washington, DC. His name is Mark Batterson. Really hit home with me this week, seeing that fact that I was worried and stressed that God doesn't care about my life, WRONG, He cares more than I'll ever know.

(Drum Roll)

God wants you to get, where God wants you to go;
More than you want to get, where you want to go.


Have a goodin.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

MAY Mix

The Mix is in, and I can't believe it.

May Flowers

1. Led Zeppelin - Communication Breakdown
2. Salim Nourallah - 1978
3. Death Cab for Cutie - The Sound of Settling
4. Typhoon - Rolling Credits
5. Audio Adrenaline - Starting Over
6. AJ Croce - Don't Let Me Down
7. Natasha Bedingfield - Unwritten
8. Jim Croce - Operator (That's Not the Way It Feels)
9. Ellie Lawson - Gotta Get Up From Here
10. Garth Brooks - Standing Outside The Fire
11. Wilco - Misunderstood
12. The Temptations - I Wish It Would Rain
13. Mountain Heart - Man In The Mirror
14. Bell X1 - Next To You
15. Jake Brennan and the Confidence Men - Believe Me
16. Al Green - Tired of Being Alone
17. Linkin Park - Somewhere I Belong
18. Oasis - The Importance Of Being Idle
19. Hootie & The Blowfish - Goodbye
20. RJD2 - Ghostwriter
21. Ween - I'll Miss You
22. Bright Eyes - Road To Joy

The theme seems to have a departing, moving on and starting over tone with a end of resilience. Good reason for it really, Two weeks ago I quit my job and I have no job that i'm going to. I'm looking for a job and I pray that job will find me and that I will find it. Radio was a beautiful thing for seven years of my life, but now I jump into the unknown and maybe, just maybe, i'll get to encourage and serve people that would make a ripple in there life that would cause ripples in the lives of others. Have an awesome day.

You Know You Have A Keeper For A Date When...

I use to call into a morning show for an hour and do some skits, talk about the news and then started a contest, Win A Date With Brent, well needless to say that quickly ended, but not before we came up with a great list of signs you know you have a keeper for a date when... ENJOY!

She has a mesh trucker's hat hanging from her rearview mirror with the playboy bunny icon on it.
She flosses her teeth with ski rope.
She uses her curlers to shape up her beard.
Her greatest ambition is to marry a high school graduate from out of state.
She's waiting for her third husband to get out of prison.
She's waiting for her second husband to get on parole.
She's wearing I love Truckers t-shirt on the first date.
Her idea of dessert is licking the bottom of the cat dish.
All she wants for Christmas is pink ice.
She can't go on a date this weekend because she has the kids.
She needs a toolbox to fix her hair.
Her idea of fun is walking around the mall and standing in the food court.
She asks can I spot her a twenty for gas money because she just bought a carton of Menthol.
You swap chewing tobacco.
Her truck goes further in the mud then yours before getting stuck.
She wants to give me a needle point Kleenex box cover for a white elephant gift.
The nicest appliance in her kitchen is her satellite dish.
She has a nicer deer head hanging on the wall than you do.
Her proudest moment was winning Miss Funnel Cake 1988.
The first thing that she would change about her house if she was on the TLC show "While you were out," would be the shag carpet toilet bowl cover.
Her favorite hobby is chewing Skoal with her Pa Pa.
She can brush her teeth without opening her mouth.
You go to pick her up at her house and she wants to introduce you to her uncle, her brother, and her ex-husband, but there is only one guy standing there.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Trucker Thursday 2

A big shout out to the Yellow UPS 18 wheeler that I got behind this afternoon. Now the two trailers that he was pulling were normal, but the actual truck cab was not its normal brown color, but instead a bright yellow. Today we salute you mister UPS Truck Driver.

Also, another shout out to the individual that used a horseshoe as a hood ornament. It was no Buick, not even a ford, nor was it a Mercedes. It my friends was a Jeep Cherokee with a horseshoe on it as I said before a hood ornament. My hats off to you if you thought you looked cool. I personally was jealous, because of my ever growing redneck side of life.

Have A Goodin'.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Whitley Wednesday's

So this feature is in honor of the Quote Queen herself, Whitley. She love's her quotes, so I have decided to honor her and all three of you readers with Whitley Wednesday's. The best the quote world has to offer. To kick things off we quote the Katharine Hepburn.

"Without discipline, there's no life at all."

This next one is great, simply because I learned this one not to long ago. I mean you've heard of the Enlightment Age, we of course live in the Entitlement Age. Katharine knew this it seems as well.

"We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers - but never blame yourself. It's never your fault. But it's always your fault, because if you wanted to change you're the one who has got to change."

And now (drum roll) the last quote for Whitley Wednesday's,

"Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything."

School of Higher Learning

I just stumbled across this and I couldn't stop laughing. I did not write this, my Diddy (Joe Hall) did, but I don't think he'll mind if I take some or all of the credit, Ok I kid. Relax Its going to be raining soon.

Hello, if you're miserable can I have your attention for just one moment? Do you hate where you're at in life? Does the idea of getting up and going to work at a dead end job make you ill? Are you ready to start earning big money right now with no risk?

This is Lucious P. Elway, owner and founder of the Elway Home Education and Read Real Good System.

When I was a kid I did not have time for school. I spent the next five years feeling discouraged, going from job to job until I realized I was at a dead end.

Then one day I discovered the secret that changed my life, and spent the next two weeks developing the Elway Read Real Good learning System. Today I can read most anything, and so can you.

For only three payments of $9 ... nine ... ninety ... carry the one ... for only nine dollars I will learn you to read good and also grammar. After one week we guarantee you will be amazed.

Please don't delay. Start learning to read good right now and be a smart new person just like me. Call right now. My momer-n-ems standing by, and there is no charge for calls after 9 pm.

LIFETIME

Today was an honest reminder that life can end at any moment, and sometimes when you aren't expecting it. Over the weekend a close friend of mine in the broadcasting community lost his son in a tragic motorcycle accident. There are no words that I can say right now that come close to my feeling when I found out about it this morning. The most shocking thing about it, was his son wasn't to far from my age, he was a young twenty year old with compassion, servanthood, humor, and a life ahead of him. He had plans and much ambition to live a long and prosperous life, probably like most of us dream right now. Unfortunately, his life ended suddenly and tragically this past Friday night. I couldn't make it to the visitation Sunday night, but I was able to attend the graveside services today. As I made my drive to the cemetery, the very cemetery that my grandfather is buried in, It became real clear to me that we are the most blessed people living here in America. We have everything at our disposal, our convenience, and our choosing. I prayed that this family would not only know the spirit of God was on them, but that they could feel the spirit of God on them. I arrived at the graveside, to witness a beautiful memorial to the son who lost his life so young. During that memorial service, stories were told, tears were shed and the good news of a young man who had fallen in love with Jesus, and had accepted Him as his Lord was proclaimed. I was sad and joyful all in the same time. As I hugged the family and tried so desperately to be a presence of God to them, I couldn't help but think, how one day I too will pass on and turn back to dust. How will I live my life during these days and how will I live them to honor and glorify a God, I love so dearly? We don't have a lot of life to waste, but we have a little life to live well. The young man lived his life well, and impacted many who were in attendance today, but how am I living my life, how are you living your life? I thought as I sat to eat lunch this afternoon, I would love the preacher at my funeral to preach the good news of Christ and the redemption in Him, but I would love more if I myself lived in such a way, that my worship to Jesus, in more than just Sunday mornings singing songs, or just merely reading my bible, but in a way that my life's worship in all that I do would be such in a way that to all of those I came in contact with would be encountered by a living God who loves them, and wants them to spend eternity with Him. Who formed them long ago for something unique than the person sitting beside them and set them apart for something extraordinary through them who are so ordinary. Life is short, Life is hard, but Life begins when we die, not just physically, but spiritually die to ourselves and are made new in Christ Jesus, and resurrected in His death and resurrection. And the greatest thing about it is, it doesn't have to be the day before you die, it can be today. May we go to the foot of the cross today and bow before a God so awesome, so loving, so compassionate, so merciful, that it cannot be consumed in merely one sitting or one day. May we go to Him with all of our past, all of our present, and all of our future, and May we offer ourselves to be His friends and to love our neighbors as we love ourselves, and may that be a life well lived to honor and glorify Him.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Realization

I'm becoming more and more aware of the fact that, everyday I'm becoming more and more redneck. I always new that I was country, but now I'm turning towards the side of red. I use to always want to be clean and look my up most best, but now I'm ok with missing a day of bathing or heck wearing dirty clothes or hat with a pig on the back of it. It's either I'm becoming more unnerved by what people think of me or I'm down the path of neckville. In fact I recently wanted to cut the top off my car with a chain saw and make it into a convertible, or today get this, I wanted fuzzy dice. Also, I'm thinking that if I ever by a bass boat and fill that ranger up with water to make it a swimming pool, I better be drinking a PBR or at least a root beer, maybe a diet coke, and wearing cut off blue jeans and wife beater t-shirt. Next thing I know I'll utter the words, "I feel safe in my trailer." If I utter these words please check me into a nutty house or heck take me to a rodeo. I'll have more bizarre redneck experiences soon, I'll just have to get up the courage to release such vital information of my soul.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Sunday School

I recently spoke at my grandmother’s Sunday school class after she came down with the flu and pretty much laid in bed the entire time that she was sick. Needless to say, she wasn't up to teaching, so she asked me if I would. How many people remember Sunday school? Maybe you didn't grow up in church, but I did. I remember it being fun in some aspects; I used to tell the teacher an alternate name when she would ask me what my name was. Mostly, it was long and boring though. The teachers would give me those wretched books with really cheesy pictures of Bible characters that were “supposed” to help you learn about God. Know wonder I would aggravate the teacher when I would enter the classroom. When I used to go to church with my grandmother, she would hand me a torn, weathered dollar bill to put into the manila envelope the treasurer of her class would pass around each week to teach us to tithe, but I also think it was so they could buy those blasted books. Side note: I really think those books have some good material and do help a lot of people, I just really don't like academics and the thought of workbooks frightened me, key word WORK.

So, when she asked me to speak for her class I knew that I was going to have to speak out of one of those rancid books, the books I dread the most. I would rather read Leviticus (which is funny just reading) than to teach out of that book. But, after hearing my grandmother in her weakened tone ask if I would teach for her, I couldn't help but to think of all those times she made me cinnamon butter toast, so I agreed. I took the book home and looked over the lesson. It finally came time to teach the class and I was nervous! I was about to enter a classroom that held the honor of hosting a group of thirty-nine year old ladies that had turned thirty-nine several, several years ago (I say that just in case they read this). These ladies had experience, knowledge, maturity, and blue hair. I felt as though I couldn't possibly teach them anymore about God, Jesus to these well honored ladies. I mean they had the class named after one of the sweet souls that used to grace the teaching duties until she went on to the great Bingo game in the sky. Also, I didn't know what to wear. I hadn't been to this church in quite sometime and I didn't know if your Sunday best was still in mandate. So, I opted for the nice, but casual approach; sports coat and polo shirt with dress pants and the nicest shoes I owned. I figured if they were going to stone me I was at least going to look good while they did it. I arrived way early because I figured if I was going to play the role of my grandmother, Joan, I better go all the way.

As the sweet ladies slowly entered the room they talked at loud levels of volume and expressed time and time again that I was Joan's grandson and her son, Doug's boy. Now when you speak to older ladies and you are a man, you must remember one thing. Ask for permission before you act. For example, if I wanted to remove my sports coat, since I'm the hottest natured person and the thermostat was set for Hades in the classroom, I would need to ask before doing so. In the same respect, I asked before beginning the Sunday school lesson, "God moves hearts to action." The lesson scripture was out of Ezra, which I previously knew nothing about. I'm just being honest. I mean the last time I heard Ezra was when they played that song "Good" by Better than Ezra on the radio four years ago. So, I opted to do the unthinkable and see what happened. I strayed from the lesson book. Gasp if you need to right now. I chose, on the other hand, to speak about another time that God moved someone's heart for action, Elijah on Mount Carmel in 1 Kings 18. You talk about tent revival. This was one that would go down in the Bible, not just the record books. So, Elijah is the only prophet of the LORD left, and God commands him to go to the prophet of Baal's, basically a prayer meeting for prophets of false gods and idols. Obviously there was a little dispute about who’s god was real, so the 450 prophets of Baal got a bull and prepared it for sacrifice by cutting it into pieces and putting it on wood. Elijah did the same to his, but neither lit them on fire. The deal was that the prophets of Baal would call on the name of their god for fire to fall from heaven and Elijah would call on the LORD. The god that was to answer by fire - he was God. It says in verse 26, “The prophets of Baal prayed and shouted, ‘O Baal, answer us!’ But there was no response; no one answered”. Elijah, which you have to love this, began to taunt the prophets of Baal saying that maybe their god was busy, or quite possibly on the toilet. Can you imagine taunting someone about their god going to the bathroom; el baƱos? I love it. Finally, Elijah told the prophets to come to him. “He took twelve stones, one for each tribe descended from Jacob, to whom the word of the LORD had come to, saying, ‘Your name shall be Israel.’ With the stones he built the alter in the name of the LORD” (18:31-32). Elijah then asked the prophets of Baal to fill jars of water and pour it over the alter not once, but three times, and they did so. Then “Elijah stepped forward and prayed: ‘O LORD, God of Abraham, Isaac and Israel, let it be known today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant and have done all these things at your command. Answer me, O LORD, answer me, so these people will know that you, O Lord, are God, and that you are turning their hearts back again" (18: 36b-37). Then, the fire of the LORD fell and burned up the bull, the wood, the stones and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench. “When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried, "The LORD - he is God! The LORD - he is God" (18:30)!

When I was done telling Elijah’s story, I could feel and sense the presence of God in that room, moving in those older, mature, and wiser ladies, and even in myself. Elijah obeyed, made himself a servant of God, and it was amazing what happened as a result. The LORD can work through you to bring glory to Himself in the most unlikely of situations. With the ladies staring at me in front of the marker board, I said, "May we begin to be obedient when we hear His voice in our prayers and may we live a life that would bring glory and honor to God." They looked moved and seemed filled with the Spirit and truth and I began to pray.

You see I noticed a couple of things that morning in that Sunday school experience that I had never noticed before. One, no matter how old or young, you genuinely want truth and love. And second, we all want to feel like we are making a difference; that we have left some sort of impression on another individual’s heart. After all was said and done with the lesson, one lady complimented another on her teaching skills demonstrated within the class. The first lady responded softly, but questioned herself saying, "I sometimes wonder if I'm really doing anything." How many times do you ask yourself a similar question? I know that I do. I was encouraged by the lady’s honesty and her humbleness. I know that as human beings, we are meant for something meaningful and purposeful, just like Elijah. First, we should start by asking ourselves if we are really listening to the voice of God or listening to ourselves. We must be obedient to Him and get under His authority so that we can get over what God has placed under us. By getting under His authority we will always receive God’s blessings, protection, and an authority to accomplish great things in the name of El Shaddai (God Almighty). You may cause God’s Holy fire to penetrate hardened hearts through the power of prayer, or completely change the face of history by an awesome God movement. Regardless, it shall be known The LORD - he is God! The LORD - he is God!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

TRUCKER THURSDAY

I'm no ACE (Important CB’er) and i'm certainly not an APPLE (A CB

addict), but I really come close to an ALLIGATOR STATION (All mouth and no ears. A

person who likes to talk just to hear himself). I have a fasination with

18 wheelers and did you see that Alligator (Tread from the tire of an 18

wheeler on the road) around mile marker 35 on I-85, if you didn't you

should have. I wanted to bring my brother along, he's an ANKLE BITER

(Small child or annoying teenager), but I love Him. So I used to work

with a APPLIANCE OPERATOR (Non technical person who knows how to turn the

rig on, and that’s about all), and if you want to know who, I won't say,

so don't ask. I do want to tell you though that a couple of months ago I

got into some trouble with a BABY BEAR (Cop in training, or rookie) He

tried to throw his weight around, but heck he had no weight, he probably

only weighed a hundred and ten pounds and thats soaking wet. The reason

for this post though is to salute all of the BIG R's (Trucks running for

Roadway Freight). If it wasn't for these fine fellers we wouldn't receive

half of all goods we do. I hope that I was COMING IN LOUD'N PROUD (Loud

and clear signal) for all who care.


ALL THE GOOD NUMBERS (Best wishes.)
Brent
CLEAR (Final transmission "This is 505 and I’m clear")

Pop Culture Question?

Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted... one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?


WOW! Who would of thought that Eminem would challenge me in a way unimaginable, and it could challenge you.

Have a Goodin!

Oh Coming Soon, TRUCKER THURSDAY.

For The Love!

Is it me but are people becoming bad drivers or worse drivers? I mean I have my times that are a little questionable, like a rolling stop here and there, the ever present ten miles per hour over the speed limit, and sometimes the forgetful turn signal, usually though without anyone behind me.

Today though hit a new low and really had me in shock for several minutes. I was driving home from a meeting at Church and I was at an intersection that isn't the best place in the world but not a place that I thought would nearly cause me to go into post traumatic shock. I pulled up to the stop sign and the stop sign somewhat lies in a parking lot of a couple of corner business, therefore leaving the road exposed to the parking lot, no curb or ditch. I hope I painted that well. Needless to say an older lady who looked to be smoking a cigarette or sucking on a lollipop, anyway I'm waiting for traffic to come around a dangerous curve and it seems that it will never end and suddenly I look to my right and this lady pulls up to the side of me. She used the parking of this business as a road, and thought I guess that I had my invisible button on and could not see my beautiful "White Lighting". I wanted to honk my horn, but I figured I would just wait and see what this woman attempted. Dang if she didn't pull out and I pull right behind her and would you know she decided today was drive twenty miles per hour day because that's what that old lady did, she drove twenty miles per hour from that stop sign to the red light about a mile and half up the road. Now there comes a point in your life that you want to quickly pull ahead of her, slam on your brakes, causing her to slam into you, then you proceed to get out of your car and say I didn't see a darn thing, and just possibly if your not careful with your emotions by this point you could slap what appears to be a wig off of her head, leaving her with nothing more than a sucker to enjoy for the remainder of her day. Of course that is just hypothetical and I would never do a such a thing, because I have turned my back on Filth, Vileness and Corruption, but being honest with you today, I thought about it. I'm human to you know. So next time you find yourself in a situation that just seems unbelievable think about those who just dreamed they could live a life of unbelievable, because don't we just waste our life or let it pass us by so many of the times during our day.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

The Name Fits

Have you ever been grocery shopping? From the sounds of the shouts at the computer monitor, I'll take that as a yes. Today was a trip to the grocery store. Now I'll be honest with you there are times in my life that I'd rather be on a stage jumping around like a dancing chicken at the county fair with a hot iron under my feet, and today was that day. I like food, in fact I love food. I use to not eat that much, because I didn't want to spend my money on things that wasn't going to last, but now that I've started the Bronzed and Buffed exercise program, I have to eat and eventually tan, but right now will worry about eating.

I spend my days in G-Langeles, and those days become long and boring, so today I thought I would change that. I decided that I would eat and that I would start that process by going to the Grocery Store. Even getting into my car, I frowned at the thought that I would have to soon get out of my car, and by soon I mean soon. I work less than a block from a grocery store. I just don't like the grocery store and that probably explains the reason number 35 exist on my list of features and characteristics I'm looking for in a woman. Number 35 says, "I hope that she likes to go grocery shopping, because I hate it". Brother, I hear that Amen. I finally arrive at the store, not even enough to time to finish singing the chorus to "Since You've Been Gone" I was a little hurt, hadn't heard that song in a while. I walk in and I'm a little intimidated, by the shear massiveness of it all. Isles and isles of food. WOW! I grab the Burgundy basket where the name fits, to begin my shopping experience. Now I have a philosophy on purchasing certain foods, at least for my purpose. I don't need anything that has to be grilled, shucked, baked, or marinated. I need quick, fast, and cheap. I grabbed some gatorade, bread, ham and turkey meat, and some tuna. Now before you go turning your nose up to my tuna, this isn't just any tuna, this is the chicken of the sea. CHICKEN FOLKS! (Bad Jessica Simpson reference.) I was about done with this excursion and then the dilemma ensues. I wanted Peanut Butter because I need protein for my Bronzed and Buff program. I'm looking at the Peanut Butter selections, and confusion strikes. Do I want crunchy or Creamy? Do I want JIF, Peter Pan or off brand? I'm still torn on those decisions even after my purchase. What Would You Do? I need to know.

I made it to the register to check out and then my next dilemma. Now if I was paid less than minimum wage I don't think I would take my job very seriously, but that doesn't mean you have to talk at such a level that I need a miracle ear on top of my good hearing just to hear you ask if I had a "Name Fits Card". Since when did you need a card at every place you go shopping at? How can toilet paper be cheaper with or without a card. Why do I need a card in order to get a deal, why can't you just like the customer enough to heck, give um' a good deal. Something different than the competition. I'm convinced that pretty soon everybody is going to have a card. You go to get your oil changed, they ask do you have your "Dip Stick Card"? You go to get a plunger from the chain hardware store and they ask do you have the "Hook Card"? Pretty soon I'm sure there going to ask if you have a "Death Card" in order to get a great deal on your casket. Moral of all of this I don't think the name fits and if it does, it doesn't fit with my name anywhere near it, especially with a Burgundy basket.

Stomach Pirantas?

What exactly is a Stomach Piranta? Where exactly does a Stomach Piranta come from?Upon research of the word Piranta, you find that it doesn't even exist and there is a good explanation as to why it doesn't exist, simply because I didn't know how to say the word Pirana.

Now, if you're like me and probably still unsure as to what a Pirana is, I'll do you a favor and look it up.

Pirana - Any of several tropical American freshwater fishes of the genus Serrasalmus that are voraciously carnivorous and often attack and destroy living animals. Also called caribe.

Now that we have the education of what a Pirana is and what it does to living animals you will understand more as to why I called a vicous attack of my insides, Stomach Pirantas. This past Friday was a glorious day with sun, wind, and beautiful blue skies. It was one of those days that you just wanted to quit your job (heck that could be everyday for some, why do you think this blog exist) and sit out on the back porch with a cup of sweet tea and not have a care in the world to stop and worry over. With a day like that it calls for a night to match. Some friends and I took the trip to downtown Greenville, which for this story will refer to it as G-Jungle. All of us made it to downtown G-Jungle enjoying a hearty, filling, and tasteful meal at an unnamed establishment just so your not afraid to eat there after this story. I had an awesome Greek Salad which I had experienced to many times to count and the others in the group had a pleasurable meal as well. After dinner and many stories about girls I liked in Middle School we decided to take a stroll to a local coffee shop. Now upon this journey to this local coffee shop in G-Jungle we crossed the Reedy River of downtown G-Jungle. At that moment, and I'm not making this up, I began to feel as if something was taking me over. It's like when your driving down the road and you hear a popping noise, such as a tire blowing out on you, well I don't know if you've ever had that happen to you, but I have. It's not a great feeling, because it's as if the tire and the car get taken over by the enormous amount of asphalt that makes up the interstate and you become as helpless as a male praying mantis during mating season. So we cross the bridge and I feel as now my stomach has been taken over by Mary Lou Retton on an Olympic Gold Medalist Reunion tour. There are all kind of cartwheels, kicks and frontward jumps going on inside that stomach of yours, with artillery, such as fetta cheese, green lettuce, onions, and other forms of goodness from the ground, what I'm saying is 'All Natur-ale foods.

It's then that you begin to panic, such as you do, like you did when you were in Middle School and you found out that for lunch, Gertrude is serving beans, which is great, the only problem is you have gym next block. My friends and I are laughing and cutting up as if nothing is wrong, all the while I'm hoping to find safety but, unfortunately safety lies only in the form of a Public Restroom. The dreaded Public Restroom. What is it about a Public Restroom that suddenly all your thoughts of I don't care what the world thinks of me suddenly changes into, Oh Gosh what will they think of me. First of all have you seen some of these facilities, I wouldn't even let my dog go into these places (if I had a dog). Second, Public Restroom also stands for PR, which some of these places need to work on by using some Public Relations to better there facilities. I quickly spot a respectable location that would be closer and less likely room for error. I was shot down. We move forward all the while I'm hoping that Mary Lou Retton would finish her routine that she started an hour ago, when it really has been five minutes ago. We finally get to the local coffee shop, when then I spot three people I know. My word not only am I being attacked by a short twenty four year old performing hand springs in my stomach, but now I've gotten the call to rush by people I know and respect, trying to make nice and dash to the Public Restroom to unleash wrath and gold medalist alike from within my body.

I make it past without any problems and get to my least desired destination. I make the room as sanitary as a person with lye, bleach, and a pressure washer can and I take care of the problem at hand. Then what seems like a never-ending story another two or three problems come to my attention. The first two were minor problems one of the first two problems wore a white t-shirt and the second of the first two problems wore Hawaiian shirt, great visitors to make life even more interesting for the reunion tour I was finally trying to put away forever. The two problems exited the Public Restroom and the third problem was noticed upon the flushing of what I will call, The Medal Ceremony. I would like to take this moment to publicly let the Public Restroom Committee know, if there is one. You may want to check the pressure of that flush in stall number one in the underground bunker of a popular coffee hangout in G-Jungle, I mean one flush standard, second flush courtesy, but the third flush is just foul. I exit the room, only after I wash my hands and pray that Mary and her gang are gone. I enter the main room of the popular hangout to sit with my friends with a look on my face of pure exhaustion. I explained in brief that I was attacked by Stomach Pirantas. Stomach Piranas would be fish, but Stomach Pirantas is nothing more the foul little gang of gymnast that landed in my stomach. At that moment laughter erupted and it was at that moment that I realized Mary Lou Retton had returned in a new form of what will be known as "Laughing Celebration".

*QUICK UPDATE*
A health specialist just informed of this shocking fact. The stomach situation you experienced is a result to being allergic to the artificial preservatives on the lettuce of the salad you had. It actually makes your stomach "Cramp -so to speak- and instead of the usual 24 hr. period it takes for food to flush through your colon it now takes 15-20 minutes, tops. Unfortunately you never know when and where, and what salads will have that preservative.

You know I think that there is a life lesson in that fact somewhere. I'm going to risk it and i'm not going to stop eating lettuce.